As we mooch or march into the next season, the natural world sounds the signal that major change is afoot. As the sheen of summer fades, leaves crisp and curl offering an invitation to go inwards and explore what’s stirring within. At seasonal junctures we’re reminded of Heraclitus’ infamous observation, ‘change is the only constant in life.’ Despite its permanence, change can feel challenging.
Yet resistance has a cost – tolerance of a life less lived. Our spirit and sense of possibility are dulled by sauntering through the same old, same old. Change can be considered an awakening, an unleashing of potential. This was my experience in taking the leap from advertising, the only career I had known, into a new world of leadership and career development.
Standing in my kitchen one day I felt physically struck by the need for a new direction. There had been signs for a while, which I’d been too busy to acknowledge – dwindling motivation which wouldn’t be buoyed by usual tactics; a feeling of loss of myself which manifested as lack of my trademark exuberance and an inability to speak about work with any level of positivity or pride. I realised I needed to acknowledge this sense of disconnection, stop tolerating the status quo and embark on a quest for better.
Developing intolerance of that situation was the spark that ignited magnificent change.
As Socrates astutely remarked, ‘The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new.’
Remembering and reconnecting with my strengths, interests and what energised me were vital early stepping stones in realising where I wanted to go next. The support of a coach who championed and challenged me along the way was also invaluable and helped me stay the course when the going got tough. Now, with Autumn incoming, it brings that timely reminder that nothing lasts forever, which enables me to embrace opportunities with excitement and possibility rather than fear.
If any of this resonates it begs the question, ‘What are you tolerating and what is it costing you?’
KATE’S TOP 3 STRATEGIES TO NAVIGATE CHANGE EFFECTIVELY:
- Focus on what you can control.
We feel safe and secure when we have a sense of being in control, yet we expend physical and mental energy worrying about things that we can’t affect. Therefore, particularly during periods of transition, focussing on what we can control – at the very least our perspective on a situation or our response to events – can be calming and empowering. Rather than seeing a job rejection as a sign that you’ll never get the role you dream of, choose to look at it as an experience to learn from and use it to hone your approach for the next opportunity.
- Pay attention to the assumptions you’re making
Our brains take shortcuts to manage the immense amount of information they deal with everyday. As a result we make assumptions based on previous experience, which are often not true or relevant to the current context. Catching and questioning our assumptions by looking for evidence can be liberating. Is your assumption true, or is the part of you that is fearful of change and simply wants to maintain the status quo making up stories? It’s natural that this fearful part, that wants to protect you from perceived ‘failure’ and the unknown, will become louder during periods of transition. Reminding yourself of what will be possible as a result of this change; why it’s important and positives that have come from previous changes in your life can help you manage the fear and enable you to keep moving forwards. ‘What’s the worst that can happen?’ has been a confidence-boosting question that many of my clients ask themselves as they step into new experiences.
- Get it out of your head.
Research has proven that writing and speaking aloud about what we’re experiencing helps us recognise and process our emotions and therefore make sense of what’s going on. Periods of transition generate a huge range of emotions, from grief and loneliness through to excitement, optimism and everything in between. The act of either writing a sentence or verbalising our thoughts and feelings to a trusted person, be it a therapist, coach or friend, forces us to structure what’s been swirling around in our heads at 3am. This can unearth new ideas, create clarity and importantly, help us focus on what we can control and then take action!
Kate is a Career & Mindset Coach located in Henley – www.seedwellness.co.uk/katelloyd
At Seed, we have a whole range of coaches to help you create the life you want. For more information or to find a coach in your area, visit https://seedwellness.co.uk/what-we-offer/life-coaching/
